Looking Death in the Eye

This episode, while very good in general, got some of its punch stolen be a severe case of been-there-done-that-got-the-t-shirt-itis. Gods are after Eve? Seen that all season. Xena and Gabrielle are dead? This is, what, the fourth time for both?

So Joxer and Meg end up together. I like that match, although it sounds like they may not be particularly thrilled about it. And they have kids. Be afraid, be very afraid. Those are some pretty young kids for how old Joxer looks. But I see his son has inherited his taste for stupid hats. Daddy Joxer should be kicked in the butt for never telling his kids any Xena and Gabrielle stories until now. I'd have thought their reaction would be more along the lines of "Aw, geez, Dad, ANOTHER story about those two??"

Hades continues to be the lamest excuse for a god in the entire Olympian order. Over the course of the episode, he fires four bolts at Xena and Eve and doesn't hit once. You'd think that godly powers could include a little hand-eye coordination.

Athena and Hades at least get points for being able to kick Xena and Gabrielle around a little in hand-to-hand combat. Athena is still MONDO cool. But her tinfoil groupies still have the dumbest outfits ever seen on the show.

It's a good thing Xena can do all that mid-air twisting, what with Eve strapped to her back while she goes flying through the air like a pinata that broke its string.

Xena and Gabrielle suffer a collective blonde moment when they hold a friggin' helmet of invisibility in their hands and fret that they have to do something. For cryin' out loud, Gab, you've done the invisible butt-kicking gig before!

Eve may be "just a baby," as Xena says at the end of the cute scene in Octavius's tent, but she's eating darned well on the road. The little gal's a chunk!

This episode gets points for its consistency with Death in Chains. Celesta still operates under all the same rules that she did in the first season. How many things can you say THAT about? Interesting point that Celesta may be immune to the twilight.

Athena accuses Celesta of caring enough about Xena to perhaps refuse to take her... is she right? Celesta could have told the gods about the tears. She shows up for Xena in Hephaestus' cave, so theoretically she'd know something's fishy at the cliffside. But she doesn't tip the gods off.

Boy, Hephaestus makes some butt-ugly knickknacks.

Watch the irresistible-force-meets-immovable-object moment when Xena throws the chakram at Hephaestus's breastplate. Awesome!

GREAT delivery on Xena's "What took you so long?" line. I allllmost believed that Xena had set herself on a suicide mission.

Gab is quite handy with that whip! She and Xena do quite a number on Hephaestus when they team up. Love that dual kick!

I thought I was being a smart-aleck when I cracked at the screen that Octavius was baby-sitting, until Xena said the same thing. What has the emperor of the Roman Empire come to?

The other gods seem to be looking to Athena for leadership. After Zeus's death, is she now the leader of the gods? Seems like an appropriate choice.

Apparently, Gabrielle carries a soundtrack in her hip pocket, because she sure as heck wasn't singing that lullaby. (It sounded good, though.)

Listen to Gab whisper to Eve after the soundtrack lullaby: "Someday you'll have your own horse." HA!

Xena really nails Celesta to the wall. Fantastic scene - great writing, awesome delivery, even the support from Gabrielle and Celesta was perfect.

There's an "awwww" moment at the end of Xena's railing at Celesta. She says she won't lose another child, and prefaces it with that she also can't lose what's left of her family, and poses for a nice portrait with Gabrielle and Eve. Somebody hand me a tissue.

Not that I'm looking to give Joxer more screen time, but if Athena used his pain to get Gabrielle to talk, how did she expect to get her details about Xena's location if they left Joxer behind?

Fantastic attitude from Xena when Athena arrives. "We were just going on a joyride to celebrate being immortal." I love it when the Warrior Princess gets cocky.

Athena once again shows her honor. When Xena agrees to trade Celesta for Gabrielle, Athena immediately signals for Gabrielle's release. A subtle and classy touch.

Classic Xena: Flip into the wagon seat, grab the reins from Ares, and take off hell for leather. Have I mentioned that I love this show?

"Why are you always asking for something you are never going to get? Get off!" But, Xena, I thought getting off WAS what he was asking for?

I realize it was a plot device so that Joxer will have something to read, but I really liked that, as she's hurtling toward the serious possibility of death, Gabrielle is frantically recording everything she can into her scrolls.

Wow, WHAT a shot from Gabrielle: sitting in the back of a tossing wagon, and she two-handed skewers two tinfoil Athena groupies!

The XenaStaff is reaping an unexpected benefit of the mulligan stew mishmash they've made of religion. With all the versions of the afterlife running around, they can get away with faking their death in front of Hades, three other gods, and with Death herself running around. All those godly types are probably assuming Xena and Gabrielle have gone to the Amazon land of the dead. Or been reincarnated. Or maybe they're in heaven. If some butterfingers angel didn't drop them into hell. Whatever.

I have no problems with the fact that the XenaVerse gods are far from omniscient. But these guys are bloody gullible. I loved Xena's heart-warming concern for Gabrielle in the wagon, and the way she threw herself over Gabrielle when they went off the cliff. But a wild wagon chase, a fire, and a drop off a cliff, and Xena doesn't even look at Eve until after the landing??? Xena does a good job of selling her reaction, late as it is, but the gods are reeeeeaaally dense for getting fooled by the babydoll trick twice.

Xena played one mighty big bluff by threatening to skewer herself. She must have figured Ares would come back, but wow, what a guess. It makes sense, though: what self-respecting warrior would choose poison for suicide? She had to get herself disarmed. At that point, self-kabobbing was probably a risk she was willing to take.

There's two flashes of blue light before Ares picks up Xena. At first, I thought Ares zapped Gabrielle and Eve, in which case he was in for a heck of a surprise. But I guess he carried away Gabrielle, then came back for Xena. And ignored Eve. Harsh.

Ares with the fallen Xena in his arms is a fantastic shot. But Ares does a little Warrior Princess juggling. He carries Xena with her head hanging on his left... but when he walks into the cave, her head is on his right.

When Joxer finishes telling his kids about Eve, why is he still looking at the long-finished scroll?

The truth of Ares's profession of love is that he buries Xena with Gabrielle. It takes an awful lot to give a beloved place of honor to the person who's responsible for stealing someone away from you. But he loves Xena - and, I think, respects Gabrielle - enough to lay them side by side. That's powerful.

For a second, there, I thought Ares had driven Xena's sword right through her ice coffin. As if being put on ice hadn't dented their recovery plans enough!

They don't actually end this episode with "To be continued...", but this is probably the most I've been looking forward to the next week's episode all season. Xena and Gabrielle are in for one heck of a surprise when they wake up. "Did an ice age move in since we died on the beach?"

Return to the Wool-Gatherings.

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