Eternal Bonds

This episode is a post-subtext-awareness boytoy episode. Xena and Gabrielle spend a little snuggly time with Ares and Joxer, respectively, but they're only because of a god- induced dream and deathbed comforting, so when it's all said and done, nothing is really changed. (ko-COPOUT-ff!)

I'm not 100% sure on any of these, but I could swear we have three bloopers in the first five minutes of the episode:

(OK, this one isn't really a blooper, just funny.)
Listen to the dialogue as we first see the horses fleeing across the sand:
   Xena: "YAH, ARGO!! YAH!"
   Gabrielle: "Yah."
   Xena: "YAHHHH!!!"
What, was Gabrielle getting tired?

After the hooded figure points the way, watch as the two horses take off. It looks like Renee's stunt double is wearing a white handkerchief to simulate short blonde hair.

When Gabrielle leads her horse into the cave, it sounds like she tells our still-unnamed-horse "Easy, girl." Wasn't Gab's horsie a stallion in Animal Attraction? Is this one going to go through the exact same kind of gender switch that Argo did from the first episode to the whole rest of the show?

Are the gods really fighting for their lives, as Gabrielle suggests? The Artemis priestess seems to think that killing Eve (and Xena for good measure) will save their gods. I thought it was just the birth of Eve that brought the curtain down on the Greek Gods, but apparently the longer she's alive, the more of 'em are going to drop.

Cute scene from Joxer when he meets Eve. I liked his hopping- n-cooing and his teeth-gritted "I'm not gonna scare her."

The magi?!? What a bizarre half-Christian reference. Three kings (rulers) who followed a star present Eve with gifts while the music from A Solstice Carol plays in the background. But they offer the wrong (and poisonous) gifts and turn out to be assassin priests. What the HECK is that supposed to mean?

Nice delivery from Lucy on "I smell a rat... come out, rat!"

ARTEMIS is hunting down Xena and Gabrielle? Artemis is the god of the amazons. Is nobody at all worried about the god of the amazons hunting down her own queen?

Pardon me, haven't we met before? In a weird copy of One Against an Army, Joxer is poisoned and must have heart-to- hearts with Gabrielle before an entire army comes down on them before an antidote can be found.

Interesting shot on Gabrielle when Xena asks if keeping watch over her and Eve is something she's willing to risk Joxer's life for. Gabrielle seems to be struggling with whether her answer is yes. She's always had a rough time with the concept of weighing lives. In this case, the answer becomes easier when it's clear that Joxer's life is definitely in danger versus only the threat to Xena and Eve. But it's still a tough decision to face.

That sacrifice/heart-ripping scene was nasty. Is this really the kind of thing Artemis, Apollo, and Poseidon are into? And what is UP with the bat ears on the priestess of Artemis?

Joxer on Argo? Something in my brain made an audible "sproing!" sound when that happened.

To add to the revolution of a proudly pregnant action hero, we now have a proudly breast-feeding action hero. And if you want to get saucy about it, you'll get a dirty diaper to the face of a diaper pin through the skull - ow! (Loved the "and that's how we do it" line at the end of that fight. This kid is getting SOME education.)

Ares' plan makes a sick kind of sense. He's still looking for a successor, but this time for himself instead of for Xena. Hey, you takes what you can gets.

I liked Joxer's humming response to Gabrielle's very heavy question, "I can be a real bitch sometimes, huh?" When someone's adoring your every move, it's hard not to enjoy it or take advantage of it. But Gab's right, it's not the most kind-hearted thing to do. And by the end of this episode, she's finally set the record straight with Joxer, and made sure he's realized where he stands. Bummer deal for Joxer, but at least now the issue's out in the open and dealt with.

NICE sucker punch by Xena on Ares (and "Oh! Damn!" reaction). Wow, those Ares willies come in handy!

Ares turns the godly pheromones on full. James Bond, eat your heart out. Xena's overheated reactions to the flashbacks were pretty funny, and that was some great hyperventilating during the final battlefield temptation. I could almost feel the godly testosterone rolling in waves off the TV.

OK, it was a dream, but I loved the net escape route for Eve. Robinson Crusoe would be proud.

The ArtemisAmazons insist on escorting Gabrielle and Joxer, despite their protests. Gab and Joxer are led away by two guides/guards. Then in the next scene, they're alone again. What'd Gab do, conk 'em on their pointy-eared heads? Distract them with "Look! The bat signal!"?

Gabrielle remembers her A Day in the Life lessons to form a flying parchment, although the rods in that scroll must have made some serious ballast for her to overcome. And if guards can smell smoke and hear crying babies, why can't they look up? Then again, they all end up at Gabrielle's kite - maybe they can.

Granted, it's a time-honored fallacy of the bad guys to attack in ones and twos even when they vastly outnumber the good guys. But I don't think I've ever seen before a long shot of the battle in the middle of a field to show the whole army politely waiting their turn and cheering on their comrades who spring forward in sequence to be slaughtered. I nearly laughed myself sick.

But that WAS some pretty impressive waste-laying Xena and Gabrielle do. I liked the shot of the bodies landing like raindrops around Joxer.

Gabrielle is fulfilling her promised role as parent to Eve. She's holding her, caring for her, and accepting gifts on her behalf. Sweet touch. And in the not-so-sweet category, she puts some muscle behind her promise to protect Eve as she does some serious damage with one of those nasty saw- toothed poisoned swordse. We haven't seen that kind of Gabinator action since a Roman legion waved crosses at her and Xena in Ides of March.

The frozen effect has been done before, but nice additional touch when Ares knocks a sword out of a frozen guy's hand.

The blood on Eve was a neat symbolic touch, but am I totally sick for thinking that the final scene of her wide-eyed look with the spot on her forehead was the cutest of the whole episode?

This episode had a disturbing message to it. Ares says that a fight is a fight, no matter which side you're on. Xena seems to agree by stating that "the greatest wrong is never to fight at all" and that "it doesn't matter where we take a stand as long as we make one." That's IT? No greater good business - now it's just important to fight? I hope that was a lingering effect from the Ares hormones talking, there.

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